Zombie konk

So what now?" Par asked in a dull, monotone voice. He had finished his meal, and was getting bored again.

"Now... we konk," replied Richard.

"We did that yesterday," Cher groaned, waving her hand in a shooing motion. "Hermit, do we have any arrows left? We could go practice our archery on the zombies. I've been getting good at it from Skyrim!"

"NO!" Walker's voice suddenly boomed throughout the room. Everyone fell silent and slowly turned their heads in his direction, eyes widened. "Par and I have already made plans! I will be building a sentry gun in the northern walls so we don't have to patrol there as often, and Par will be sniping the zombies from afar!"

"This isn't Team Fortress, you bloody sausage," muttered Richard. "Anyhow, if you lot don't want to konk, what do you suggest as a better idea? Go on, state yer ideas, you sausagewanks."

Everyone sat around for a bit, thinking. Bill stood up and cleared his throat, smiling.

"We shall sneak behind enemy lines and scope out the pet store down the street," he said confidently. "There are sure to be many puh-ussiiiiies there."

"No... no..." Richard moaned. His voice sounded somewhat sinister for a moment. "You're even dumber than your-"

"g0ld, you're doing it again," Par interrupted.

"It's the bloody cheese, I tell you!" replied Richard. "Ever since this fookin' zombie apocalypse, those inconsiderate sausages at the Dr. Pepper factory stopped producing! I've had to find a substitute!"

"Blood isn't so bad," suggested Par.

"Par... just... no," Walker protested.

"Ever since they ate Boogie, you've been saying that to me an awful lot," said Par. "Anyways, Bill may actually be on to something. With his smell, the zombies may actually mistake him for one of their own! Or not want to eat him... either way, he could get through them and get to that radio tower and call for help."

"And what would prompt... such a shitty plan-ah?" Bill asked sarcastically in his fish-like voice.

"Think about all the pussies you could snag if we were to get out of this hellhole," Par explained. "No more zombies, just pussies."

"Very well..." agreed Bill. He turned to Cher, knowing her strategies to be the best. "The pussy is no longer safe. Chart a course to the radio tower! Get me there first or there'll be the stench to pay!"

"First?" asked Richard.

"Who brought that disgusting plague into our town? WHO FED THEM THE BOOGIE BABY?!" Bill shouted, spraying spit everywhere. It was an awful lot of spit for one person, almost like his mouth was full of water. "Dentface..."